When we meet for a first date, skip the handshake.
Business partners and co-workers shake hands. I am neither. So don't treat the date like we are about to conduct a meeting. Unless you are completely repulsed by the thought of even touching me upon first glance, let's keep things on a date level....
When we meet for a first date, skip the handshake.
Business partners and co-workers shake hands. I am neither. So don't treat the date like we are about to conduct a meeting. Unless you are completely repulsed by the thought of even touching me upon first glance, let's keep things on a date level.
Don't be a brick wall with your emotions.
If you are interested in me, let me know. flirt with your eyes a little bit. Touch me on the arm when engaging in conversation. If you are into me, make the effort to show it.
Reach for your wallet.
Let's just say I'm not exactly old school in this regard. When women offer to pay for the first round of drinks or insist on paying for the second round, this instantly ups my interest. No, it is not because I am a bum that wants a sugar momma to take care of me and pay my car bills. It has absolutely nothing to do with money. It's the gesture that I love. This reveals to me that I am with a woman who is kind, generous and not in the slightest bit selfish. More importantly, I know that these qualities will likely carry over into all aspects of our future relationship, not just monetarily.
Listen to me when I speak.
There is nothing worse than a date that just talks over you, without registering anything that is being said in her direction. Many single women are guilty of this terrible habit without even realizing it. The frustrating part is that many of these women are genuinely sweet and nice people. But I am on a date to have a great time, not to be ignored. If I felt like being talked at for two hours, I'd be having drinks with my grandmother.
Show your femininity.
At the end of the day, men are visual creatures. Women are beautiful by nature. Take advantage of this. Take the time to highlight all those beautiful features you have. Leave me thinking about how great you looked long after the date is over.
Bring something unique to the table.
First dates can be so monotonous. I want to learn something about you that separates yourself from everyone else. Show me your secret talents, tell me a crazy story from your childhood, share a secret. Anything that breaks the monotony of a typical first date is always a good thing.
Don't brag to me about all your accomplishments.
Nothing impresses me more than an accomplished woman. This is incredibly sexy. But let this information come out naturally. Don't sit there the whole date listing all the great things you've done at inopportune times. This only makes me think they you are self-absorbed and way too eager to prove yourself.
Show a willingness to try new things.
The number one fear of entering a long-term, monogamous relationship is the inevitable boredom that will one day arrive. Ease my fear of this happening by showing a willingness to try new hobbies and develop new interests. Women who are content with their week to week routines are boring, and will only become more boring as the years go by.
Let me know that your life isn't all about work.
Work should be a big part of your life, but not the only part. So many women I have encountered in NYC live the exact same life: Work, gym, dinner, drinks with friends, bed, rinse, recycle, repeat. Having a great career is sexy. Having nothing but a great career is not sexy.
Bring the enthusiasm.
This should be an obvious one, but, if you're into me, show you're excited to be on the date. I'm not looking to feel as if I'm your third date this week on your endless serial dating quest to find the perfect man. Emotions are highly contagious. Acting excited before and during the date will make me excited as well about the moment and the future.
Don't even think about touching that phone.
If you are going to text during the date or pick up a phone call, see ya later. One text message is permitted for online daters who have a friend that is checking to make sure they are safe. But anything more than that is not cool unless it is an emergency.
Confidence is key.
Self-confidence is extremely attractive. Women with high self-confidence give off vibes that they have something special going on, and I want to find out what that is.
Show me your passion in life.
What makes you different from every other pretty face out there? A passion can be something completely original and exciting or something as simple as raising a great family. Regardless, I want to know that you are passionate about something, and hopefully, something that I could take part in as well.
No talking about ex's.
I don't need to know anything about your ex on a first date. Enough Said.
Ease up on planning our whole future.
There is a difference between saying let's go out on a second date and planning our whole future together. It's okay to like me. It's not okay to suggest a whole list of twenty different future dates we should go on in the future. I may be into you, but if I feel too much pressure early on, I will run.
At the end of the day, this may be the most important quality I am looking for. Chemistry can't be learned, it can only be felt. Without chemistry, every quality above is irrelevant.